‘Mid-Project Regret Syndrome’ Might Be Why You Hate DIY Projects

We’ve all been there—big plans, huge, for an amazing DIY project. Visions of beautifully refinished hardwood floors or gorgeous new crown molding are enough to spur you out the door and to the nearest home improvement store. "Who needs a professional?!" may be the rallying cry, but the project may be… ambitious.

At least that’s what you realize an hour into a project that somehow has turned into something that is consuming your weekend or, it may feel like, your whole life. Who thought this was a good idea, anyway? Well, you did, at first. 

You may be suffering from “mid-project regret syndrome,” or MPRS for short. MPRS is a thing—and it’s happening to a lot of us. If you’re one of the 89% of would-be DIYers who lose steam halfway through a project, chances are you’re looking at an unfinished project (or more!) at home. 

The good news: You’re not alone. The better news: You can prevent this and deal with it even if you’re in the midst of it. For help, we asked a couple of experts to finally help you beat mid-project regret syndrome. 

What Causes Mid-Project Regret Syndrome?

So, what’s actually happening when we run out of steam? “You also have only so much cognitive capacity,” says Stephani Robson, PhD, who’s a senior lecturer emerita at Cornell University's School of Hotel Administration and currently consults on hospitality design projects.“If you've got a stressful job or you've got a busy family, sometimes [DIY projects] can be nice and immersive, and they take you out of yourself, which can be really pleasant.” 

But sometimes, she says, we become frustrated by unrealistic expectations. Take painting a room, for example. Reading many articles will make you “think that you can pull this off in a weekend at Home Depot,” she says, “and there's this self-satisfied woman standing there with this perfectly painted room and she's got no paint on her and no swear words have been uttered. You know, that's just completely unrealistic.” 

It took Robson three weeks to paint a small entryway. She adds, “And we're very prone to feeling bad about ourselves if we don't meet some sort of external expectations.” And what do we do when we feel bad? Probably not keep on keeping on.

How to Prevent Mid-Project Regret Syndrome

The key, then, says Dr. Robson, is to have eyes wide open going into a project. Knowing you’re replacing a light fixture, say, isn’t the whole story. What tools do you need? What has to be done before you get to the fun part of shopping for a fixture? Because if you don’t plan well you may end up with a light bulb hanging out of your ceiling for weeks (raises hand).

Create a Vision Board

Kim Jones, a professional organizer in Louisville, KY who also helps people (including yours truly) move, lives and breathes advance prep, and can’t leave a project undone; it’s her job! Her advice? “Before starting any project, take the time to create a vision, get in the right mindset, and identify what motivates you. It is important to document this prior to the project, so when you feel like quitting you have a quick reference to get motivation back!”

Jones’ secret weapon “may seem silly,” she says, “but before every project, I create a vision board. I want to see exactly how I want the room to look, and I add keywords on how the room will feel. It is good to have the entire picture, otherwise, you are likely setting yourself up for failure and will not be able to finish the project.”

Check In With Yourself

Jones’ next step is a mindset check, she says. Be honest with yourself. It’s so easy to get carried away with imagining the finished result, but ask, “Am I feeling up to taking on a project or is my schedule too tight to breathe, much less add a project onto my plate?” 

Plan a Realistic Timeline 

If you’re mentally ready, “take a look at your calendar and find a time that is manageable to take on a project,” Jones says. “Maybe it is a long weekend, or a month where work and activities are lighter than normal. Then mark the project on the calendar and prepare to be ready.  This would include buying any supplies if needed, so you are fully committed. This process sets you and the project up for success, rather than just deciding on a whim on a Thursday night to start pulling off wallpaper and redo an entire room.”

How to Overcome Mid-Project Regret Syndrome

What if it’s too late, you’ve already started a project, and you’re at that point where you abandoned ship? Once you lose momentum and move on, it’s likely “you start getting used to the fact that there's just a light bulb up there, and every now and again, you notice it and kind of think ‘I need to do something about that,’ and then life goes on,” says Dr. Robson.  

That’s a psychological term called habituation, she explains. “And because it isn't something that gets in the way of your day-to-day life, it becomes less crucial that you resolve it. I'm laughing, because in my upstairs bedroom, I wanted to put in shoe molding. I bought that shoe molding in 1999—and it’s still in my basement.”

Bribe Yourself

To get over that hump, we may need to treat ourselves like the little kids that we are at heart, Dr. Robson says, and, well, basically bribe ourselves. It’s really important to be kind to yourself, she adds. 

“Use little prizes to bribe yourself,” she says, awarding them at specific steps along the way. Rather than waiting for a big reward of finishing at the end, most people respond better to rewards for small steps, she says.

Others may respond to what she calls external motivators, such as inviting family over for dinner on a date you expect to be done. “There are people who just need that real kick in the pants of ‘Oh my god, my mother's coming,’” she says. But use caution with this approach, she warns, “because an external motivator can sometimes make you feel very resentful.” You may get done, she says, but it may be slapdash.  

Listen to Your Needs

At the end of the day, give yourself what you need. “Projects, especially big ones, can be exhausting and there may be times when you sit in the middle of a space and just have a good cry,” Jones says.  “This could potentially be avoided before you get to that place. You know your body and mind better than anyone—listen to it. If you are feeling discouraged and overwhelmed, take a break and rest. Take a walk—whatever to get your mind back to a space of motivation.”